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| I never understood while people blogged. Usually people don't care what
other people do everyday. But those who ask really do care so there is
reason for a everything. However, people also write to vent, or to
share an opinion. Others also write to feel better and express whats
inside regardless of people read it, relate to it, comment on it, or
not. I am the latter. I find myself undergoing Music Therapy. What for?
Simple, I'm having a crisis. Well, that can be argued. Am I too young
for a crisis or is it the effects of a profound event. Again, I am the
latter. I'm too young for a crisis. I'll be turning 18 in a week
however so does it count? Anyways, I've been listening to the music of
Mat Kearney. He is an extraordinary artist. He'll just be another
artist in my timeline of Music Relating To Emotion. You know how those
go; certain songs remind you of a certain feeling or moment in your
life. Yea, thats it. So where am I going with this? I really don't
know. I've been told I dont know what i want, and thats true. But I do
know that im in love. And no matter how much I said I moved on, I'll
still be in love. First loves never die. Thats true. Everything happens
for a reason. So I guess reason is what drives our lives. Reason why we
met that night, reasons why we fell in love, reasons why it had to be
like this, reasons why we're here today. We can't explain how the world
works, but we can accept that the world works in our favor. If i could
tell you my state of mind in the last few weeks with a movie title it
would be Black Hawk Down. Simply chaos, darkness, unfamiliarity but
then theres calm and daylight. Personally I liked it when my mind was
the Girl Next Door. Moral Fiber and everything and more. But I've
learned that pessimism will drive you crazy and be the result of your
own doing. So I've reached that point in the movie where the soldiers
are returning back to base, edited in slow motion with the dawn
breaking behind them and the calm and familiarity creeping into the
movie mood. So thats where I am today. I see the light. I've been
looking at what I lost when i should have looked at what I had. But
dont get me wrong, I still have it and its not lost. I'm speaking in
terms of relationship. There are no cut ties or lost love. Love will
always be there and it will be what we have in common and more. I also
know that love works in mysterious ways and we shouldnt underestimate
its power. With both our lives changing we really dont know whats going
to happen. But we do know that we must move on. Sounds hard but its
not. Its actually quite easy because I know we're different. Love is
the difference and Love will guide us home. But in the meantime, we
take what we have and we do our best with it. So im learning. But there
are so many things in my mind I cant comprehend and I've tried to in
the last few weeks. I've given up trying to figure it out and blame it
on reason. However, I do feel angry for being trapped in the fear of my
parents. Everything would have been easier had i moved out. Things
could have been clearer. Sidenote, its really fascinating what
chemistry two people can have with one another. The best things truly
take you by surprise. It also hurts like hell sometimes. But theres
nothing I can do now except fall into the cliche that I am in love with
my best friend whether they like it or not. So my closing lines will be
directed to one person and you know who you are.
Reason is why we're here. Reason is where we'll be. And if reason is
the driving force in our lives then we have all the reason to keep our
love alive. | | |
| So I'm back from camp and it was aweeeeeeeesome. Even though I lost a lot of sleep it was the best time of my life. Everyone was cool, met some awesome ppl and made memories w/ old friends. However, there were some fags who didn't know when to stop being gay, but thats the least of my worries. so heres what i gotta say:
Bo: thanks for helping me w/ my layout til 4. Matt talking in his sleep. Keep strong homie. hey jump! How high? snap snap and I'm there. haha. Bob and bonnie reminds me of camp. Its the anthem. sprinting back to the dorm w/ u and shaan in order to do stuff. "shuuup Shaan" "stop being a little bitch!" Kool aid man! Metal!?
Matt: ya booy u and amanda. such a little man whore. good thing u brought the vball. I really wanted to kick those kids ass across the room. "beat the stripe off his head!" Big brother to Danielle. Who would be intimidated by you!? lol jk.
Shaan: "Stop beinga little bitch!" strong fist. u suck, cuz of u i had to redo my layout, but ur my boy so its ok. but still dotn let this happen in the year! gooddddd times spazzing out and having an anger session of continuous cussing. oooo and dont forget our throwdown. lol that was fun too.
Kiki: "uh ohhhhhhhhhhh!" ahhhh thats ringing in my head. Cup game, charades, snorting game. Awesommme. C'est la vie. we're going down down doo doo doo doo dooo. do u remember it now? if u forget, its "in an earlier round" oh ya and. "guy stuff"
Danielle: Gimme a model pose. U and kiki and awesome and the year is gonna be so fun w/ you guys. Hope you enjoy that present bo and I made for you. shes cute huh? "the messy but cute one"
all in all, camp was awesome. I miss it.
If i forgot any more jokes and highlights lemme know so i'll never forget.
lata!
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| Well, last night I sessioned with my new band. FITC just sort of faded away ever since our last one and plus we had other stuff to do. Wilson and his boys needed another guitarist so they recruited me. It went well last night, they needed a lick for their song so I hooked them up with one and it sounds good. All in all, first sesh with the new guys was good. We'll see what happends in the summer such as shows and stuff. So what else is new? Well....nothing!
Lata.
O, I have my permit. Noooiiice. | | |
| Alright, well its Sunday and I'm really bored, so ill just update. Well, from the last post some things happend. AP test, which was hard, now CAT testing w/ block scheduling but thats over now, Vball season is over, our banquet is this Thurs w/ awards and stuff. I think we're getting catered by Pat and Oscars....I got contacts now, I still dont have my permit..other than that its been chill. Today is gonna be a kick ass day cuz I'm going to Staples w/ James and Sammy to see wrestling. Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeea. i havent tuned in for awhile but I've been to one along time ago and the atmosphere was awesome. Plus ringside seats for 60 cuz........... we got hook ups.
Friday- Hung out w/ Jeremy and drove around RSM, went to B's Cuz's house then was gonna go bowling but Jeremy couldnt go and he was our ride so we called up Kelly and he came over w/ Kim and Jessica. Talked, mingled and what not until kelly had to pick up cathy so kim went w/ him and jess hung back w/ me and B. so we didnt have any other place to go at 10 at night so we went to trabuco mesa park and just dicked around. Another random, RSM friday adventure in the life of Rich and B. Thank you.
BTW Senses Fail is one of my fav bands now. They're new (but not out yet) album is the shit. Go get it suckas. | | |
| Sat: Driving School. Hella Boring. Sat by hot girl. Hella hot, cept she was probably a druggy with a mulletish hair do. Had lunch at Baja Fresh, called as many people as possible just to talk cuz i needed to talk to someone I knew. 9-4 in the same room....it suuuuuuuuuuuuux. Its like school but in ur worst teacher's room for the whole day. On a good note, the teacher was hella cool. Laid back, chilled out, mexican guy. He's so funny, like seriously, comedian type of funny. He's that good.
Lata. | | |
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